Handy Woman Practice

Big Lott's Bar Stools

Hey where did that cat come from?

I am as feminine as they come, or so I like to think. However, there is one typically non girly skill I master (or am somewhat decent at). I can put shit together like a champ. Stereotypically this is a male skill. You fequently hear handy man, rarely ever handy woman. My handy skills development started at age seventeen when I moved away from my parents house to get my learn on. It started small. A table here. A gadget there. Then I moved on to the big time stuff like my bed and my treadmill (my greatest accomplishment to date). It just so happens that I never have anyone around to help, so with a determined mind I wrangle the task solo.

I have been in my new apartment for about two months now. Thus far, I have transformed my loving bed in to a multi purpose working, eating, sleeping, cat cuddling, writing, and exercise station. I lied about the exercise part. Anyway, I figured it was about time I invest in some actual chairs. My back will surely thank me. Off to Big Lott’s I sashayed… or something like that.

I spotted the winning stool almost immediately after finding my way to the furniture. It was fate. It may or may not have been the only bar stool in the store, but I am going to stick with fate. It just sounds better. As the busy store clerk went back in to the abyss of stock to fetch my two twin stools, I began to wonder how I would fit the chairs in my car. Sometimes I plan ahead. This was not one of those times. As I was configuring dimensions in my head, the clerk casually strolls back up to me with a buggy containing two boxes that looked like they could only hold a small picture frame let alone two 30″ full size chairs. I felt a little disappointed in myself for not even considering that assembly may be required. “Where can I find the screw drivers?”.

After an absurdly long selection process in the tools aisle and eighty bucks later, I was heading home to embark on yet another handy woman project. I got this. Maybe.

If there is another thing I am good at, it is not reading directions.  I guess you could say I’m more of a – figure it out using only your confused little mind – kind of gal. I ended up having to crack open a beer after the first failed (that screw definitely doesn’t go there) attempt. Eventually I ended up with two sittable apparatuses and a smug grin. I still got it people.

The screw drivers never did get their debut however. Come on Becca, everyone knows these things come with allen wrenches. It is a shame really, after all that time and thought I put in to selecting just the right screwdriver set. Regardless, I am proud to say I am writing this very post comfortably perched atop my successful creations. Did I mention they spin?

What is the most complex thing you ever had to tinker with?

Oh, I also had some good luck this weekend. I am the elated winner of Findingravity’s sweet giveaway (a  makeup bag from pinnedpretty on Etsy). I will show off and brag later, but for now I celebrate.

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About becca3416

Becca Cord is a twenty-something year old southern ballerina turned humor writer and video editor. Having lived in Louisiana her entire life, she is now perusing her travel dreams while starting her own free-lance Web Marketing business and organizing a nation wide blogging event, Blogger Interactive. She believes one of her callings is making people laugh, and she intends to do so. You can find Becca on her personal blog, Facebook page, or Twitter @becca25tofly.

Posted on May 20, 2012, in Adventures, Experiments, Home, Humor, Inspirational and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 28 Comments.

  1. you get those at bed, bath, and beyond?

  2. My wife reads the directions. You need a wife.
    Or maybe you could just rent one to assemble furniture for you… That would probably be better, right?

  3. was gonna comment that I get my handy on all the time but that just sounds bad. I have put together a ton of stuff but most recently a gas grill and it didn’t blow up or anything.

  4. wow, I didn’t know you had this talent! Spinning stools! But wait a minute, were they designed to “spin,” or did you just skip a few steps in the screwing/bolting process. Either way, impressive!

    • Oh how I wish I could say I was that cool at improvising on the bolting to where I accidentally add spinning features. They were actually made to spin. I am just considering myself luck that I haven’t crashed and burned with all the rotating I have been doing all day. Nothing like a full Sunday of making myself dizzy!

  5. I feel like…we’d be really good friends outside of the bloggy universe. Aside from the fact that the English major in me always urges me to follow the directions when putting things together, I rarely follow directions in life haha!

  6. I used to build furniture for a job. I hate it when I get something like that that needs to be put together. The most complicated thing, though, was my road bike. The cables had to be in the right spot and the handlebars just right and the derailleurs set up perfectly (they still aren’t). At least it doesn’t fall apart while I ride.

  7. You can come fix my toilet if you want!

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