Category Archives: Fitness

Titles Are For Days That Aren’t Monday

It’s Monday again. It is Thanksgiving week. I am going for two cups of coffee today. Maybe snort some pixie stix too. It could only help at this point.

I haven’t had this tired of a Monday in a while. I suppose that’s what all the traveling this weekend did to me. And all the baby holding. You will be relieved to know that the baby is still alive and well after the holding.

becca and baby

Just waiting to misplace my hands and cause her head to pop off.

After I successfully didn’t kill my godchild, I finally completed the run for which I have been training. Remember, that was why I was going to the gym so much. No attractive males involved there.

You will be happy to know that I thought of some of you while I was there. Read the rest of this entry

Stuff’s a Brewin’

This is a quick post to announce a few things.

running shoe with toes

1. Behold a cool new running shoe that makes me feel like I am in the future. Or, a reptile. I haven’t decided.

2. I have a muscle in my rib cage that has been twitching for THREE WHOLE DAYS. I’m not aggravated by it or anything.

3. I can’t stop obsessing over my twitching muscle long enough to use two hands to type an actual post.

4. I spotted the disappearing fox from 301 yesterday in a turn of events.

5. I have hired the help of The Man Huntress to help me keep track of him from now on.

6. You will get to find out who The Man Huntress is soon enough if you pay attention.

Hint: She has double the visual powers of a normal blogger. You know, for spotting attractive men in the wild.

7. Rich, ignore this post. You are the only fox for me, even if you are a silver fox.

becca cord signature

Day 26 at My Not So Gem of a Gym

bad personal trainer

What this tale didn’t look like. Mostly, because I was on a treadmill, and I am surprisingly not a ripped black man. The rest is pretty accurate.

A while ago I wrote a post about the not so welcoming demeanor of my gym’s personell and other unfortunate events that occur in my place of workout. After I wrote the post, I wondered if it was all in my head… until yesterday.

I will pat myself on the back a bit by saying that this marks my sixth week of training for the color run in New Orleans in November. My regimen has been a full hour-long workout, five days a week. Actually, next time you receive a comment from me, I will most likely be posting it from either the treadmill, stationary bicycle, or the locker room where I am stealing towels. Wait, what?

The way I train is to run in intervals. This week, I have worked my way up to running six-minute intervals broken up by one minute of walking. I repeat that five times. Anyway, yet another odd interaction happened to me yesterday during my run.

I was jamming to Alanis in attempts to get that angry run going. I had only gotten through two intervals when the owner of the gym scared the endorphins out of me approached me in a normal manner. He practically jumped on the belt and started running with me. After realizing that he was actually just trying to talk to me, I slowed down to a brisk walk and unplugged my ears. This is the conversation that ensued: Read the rest of this entry

My Gym Is Not a Gem

Now that I have fully recovered from my Sketchers catastrophe, I have resumed training for the Color Run. I am braving this 5k at the end of November. Training is so much more difficult than the actual run. Obviously, there are no strangers cheering me on by throwing powdered rainbows on me while I slave on the treadmill. There also isn’t a celebration with beer waiting for me after I complete my reps on the weight machine. Who am I kidding. We all know there is beer waiting in my fridge, but that doesn’t change the fact that training just… sucks.

How you actually look like when you run

Swap the bubbles for a beer and it’s pretty spot on.

To make matters worse, I have come to the understanding that either the place is just plain old bad luck, or the employees at my gym are purposefully sabotaging me. If the latter is the case, it is probably just because they are jealous that they don’t have the balls to workout in men’s long jonhs. I also don’t sweat, which is neat. Read the rest of this entry

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