Category Archives: Inspirational
Parts of this post are hypothetical. Maybe.
I read a post today by Lament’s and Lullalbies that I thought was brilliantly human, which is odd, because I know internet people aren’t people at all, they are aliens. Cool aliens, but aliens nonetheless. Don’t worry, I am not phoning the MIB… yet.
Her post addresses the human condition of struggling between making ends meet and making your dreams come true. She writes in a way that is synonymous with the mosh pit of a thought process that I assume begins in most people’s minds when thinking about these issues. Everyone has an ideal career, or two, or three, or is at least on the search to finding one. Everyone also faces the ongoing obligation to provide for themselves at the same time. It is all a huge balancing act and we don’t have the proper equilibrium. In my case, I am just drunk. Read the rest of this entry
As I approach my 24th birthday in two weeks, I feel there are some apologies that need expressing.
1. First and foremost, I am sorry for that one time when I was ten and “accidentally” dropped that bird egg just to see what would happen. I knew. Hello instant guilt and remorse. On the bright side, I then crossed murderer off my potential what-ill-grow-up-to-be list.
2. I am sorry and ashamed that I still haven’t learned to spell accidentally or pursue correctly on the first try. If it weren’t for those squiggly red lines sometimes I swear…
3. I apologize to my Iphone for treating you like Ren treats Stimpy. You stupid idiot.
4. I am particularly sorry for that time drunk-artist-me drew a mural in the ladies bathroom with my lipstick at insert-local-bar-name-here. Mostly, because I will never find a more perfect pout paint. And, a special apology to whomever had to clean it up, but you know I made up for it at the regulars’ Christmas party.
5. I am sorry that the last sentence of the previous apology had sexual undertones. I assure you the Christmas party was only PG-13 at most, and that I didn’t take anyone in to a coat room. We don’t even have coat rooms down here.
6. I am sorry that half pint regularly posts photos like this on my Facebook.
6. Third floor apartment. No elevator. Do I even have to say it?
8. I’m sorry that number 7 was actually a lie. I am not sorry in the least. In fact, I want to make an album and use this photo mash up as cover art. Only with better shop-ing of my head.
9. No, I do not want to give you my name, number, e-mail address, pin number, fingerprint, and donate a dollar to the prevent paper cuts foundation. Sorry. I just want to go home.
10. More sincerely, I am sorry that I wasn’t thinking of what all that tanning with afro-sheen was going to do to my skin past the age of 16.
Here is to 24: the age when nothing happens. Isn’t it magical?
- Why Women Apologize So Much More Than Men (businessinsider.com)
- Lunchtime Quiz: The Ren & Stimpy Show (mentalfloss.com)
- 5 Tanning Myths You Can’t Afford to Believe (bellasugar.com)
[Look! I have a really cheesy cover, and I am cheap, but it’s what’s on the inside that counts, right? Click my obnoxious cover to buy me on Amazon. Yay!
[Also, the title says “for grown-up girls”, but that shouldn’t stop the fellas from checking it out. Would I steer you wrong? Well, not intentionally at least.]
I returned to reality and a Sunday of cooking stuffed bell peppers with a new addition to slide onto my make-shift bookshelf. In her normal fashion, Booger handed down a book to me as an early Birthday present. Its title is The Merit Badge Handbook for Grown-up Girls by Lauren Catuzzi Grandcolas. Her name makes my jaw hurt a bit, and I didn’t even attempt saying it out loud. Filled with activities, projects, goal ideas, and new learning/experience opportunities, you could think of this book as a sort of generalized bucket list and guide. My initial appreciative reaction was quickly followed with eagerness to start flipping pages. Upon doing so, something unexpected happened.
The beginning of this year had me sulking in the realization of all the things I have yet to do in/with my life. I have a hard time being patient when on a quest. Nothing was helping, especially not seeing all the cool stuff other people around me were doing. Then, I began writing again and went from sulking to basking in the new-found determination I had to start doing things. New or different or scary or silly or constructive or whatever kind of things, it didn’t matter. No more ruts. Read the rest of this entry
[Let’s pretend that this is an appropriate photo for this post, and you can just call me whatever the female Vito would be called. Or, just let me pretend I look this cool. Alright, I am a horrible phony. I haven’t even seen The Godfather. ]
You know what I have seen though? A bunch of ultra-sounds and baby bump pictures. Yes, the infamous Booger is growing a tiny human these days. While I never expected we’d planning her reveal party for the sex of the baby this weekend, I also never expected to get so amped about baby stuff in general. And probably the least expected, but most incredibly exciting part of it all… she offered me the position of godmother.
Here in the south, godmothers are generally called the nanny and the godfather is the paran (I don’t think I can give an accurate phonetic spelling, so just pronounce that with your best French accent). When Booger called me to ask what I would prefer to be called (Godmother, Nanny, Aunt Becca), the whole life changing event became more real in my eyes. I can only imagine how she feels.
All of my friends know me as the one who was never overly concerned with settling down or marriage and definitely not procreating. The slightest thought of child-birth always triggers the “NOPE!” section of my brain. Even as a child, I never fantasized about my wedding or was much for playing with baby dolls that were promised to realistically defecate on me. I was more in to putting Ballet Barbie in her convertible and playing make-believe as a restaurant owner. No lie, I had boxes of faux meal receipts that I organized to keep tabs on my imaginary diner’s success. We had the best hot dogs. All the regulars said so. Read the rest of this entry
Today I have two orders of business. I so wish I had a gavel and had just said that out loud. The first includes me thanking a really kick-ass person by the name of Jillian. She has awarded me with my second blog award, the One Lovely Blog Award, and it couldn’t have come at a better time. I am
secretly openly envious of her bravery as she takes on Southeastern Europe. She is all about couch surfing, bungee jumping, and smooth talking security. Seriously, some of the stuff she does makes my zip lining excursion look like mini-golf in comparison. You can tag along on Jillian’s journeys here. Thanks for the compliment and added encouragement Jillian.
(Probably) Super official rules of accepting this award:
1. Thank the person/people who nominated you and link back to them in your post.
2. Share seven possibly unknown things about yourself.
3. Nominate fifteen or so bloggers you admire.
4. Contact the chosen bloggers to let them know and link back to them.
I’ll go ahead and get this out of the way:
1. I have an artificial right upper lateral. Also known as… I gots a fake tooth, ya heard. I was born without the permanent one that’s supposed to be there.
2. In my super viable medical opinion, I believe that very tooth got lost somewhere in the incubation period of my existence. Turns out it was just chilling with my wisdom teeth. That’s right, I had five wisdom teeth.
3. That’s enough about my dental history, but along the same lines I have never broken a bone.
4. My feline children are named after playing cards.
5. Whiskey is my biggest vice.
6. I absolutely can not wear socks under covers and definitely will not sleep in them.
7. I am in serious relationships with a lot of inanimate objects… but if you have been reading along with my blog for a while, you probably already knew that.
And now, I am going in to slacker mode and cheating a little bit. It is Friday and fifteen blogs is a lot, so I am going to slice that in half. Everyone who is anyone cheats on these things anyway right? We will just call it tweaking the rules. Here are some of my latest blog crushes. Does a blog count as an inanimate object? I mean the physical blog is inanimate, but the people writing them are not. Wow, this will be a long day. Back to the podium, and mind you these are in no specific order.
Kenny is an aspiring comedian. He is funny and insightful. You will like him. Oh, did I mention he sings?
I wish I could have been around when this guy was teaching, or rather, I wish this guy could have been around when I was learning. Either way I am sure he will correct me and then flatter me. Oh Rich, how I enjoy our interactions.
Using his units of measure, this guy is pretty sweet. Awesome dad. He will make you cry, then make you laugh.
I hate that I have never done half the outdoorsy stuff Sarah does, but I love living vicariously through her blog. Man, do all the cool people live in New England?
This one is definitely in my top five favorite blogs. If you like book writing bellmen, here’s your guy.
This blogger has a spiffy design to her blog, and I think her blog name is catchy to boot. Plus, she writes interesting stuff.
He is not a business man, he is a business, man. That comes straight from this guy’s about page. We’ve got a clever one here. Read his blog.
All I can say is inspiring. I would say much more, but now my fingers are sleepy. I have much love for this blog as well.
I am sure most of these people don’t need me to nominate them for some award. I am equally certain they must all know they are wonderful already. Regardless, there it is. If I have missed some sort of anti-award clause somewhere in your information, I apologize. I probably shouldn’t get ahold of a gavel after all.
Oh yeah, and for the second order of business, remember how I actually won something that one time? Probably not, but my prize finally arrived. Findingravity is the shiz.
- One Lovely Blog and Kreativ Blogger Award (jabelah.wordpress.com)
- One Lovely Award and Blessing (inlovewiththelord.wordpress.com)
- Awards! Many lovely awards … (evatenter.wordpress.com)
[Awww yeahhh 1993. What a bright pink bathing suit I’ve got there. Wait a damn minute, was that really almost twenty years ago?!]
Sometimes I forget about things. Sometimes I get lazy. Sometimes I do both simultaneously.
As I was driving down the highway, I could hear the ice chest in the trunk sloshing around. It sounded like I had a dead body back there. We were close enough to the next stop we were making on our way to Denham Springs for me to ignore it for a few more miles. We finally pulled up on the curb of a friend’s house. The caravan of cars ahead of us had filed neatly into the driveway.
I peeled myself from the driver’s seat and went around the rear of my car. I figured I would investigate what was causing my ice chest to slingshot around my back seat like a bouncy ball. My friend had initially loaded the ice chest. Since I frequently stash things in my trunk (don’t worry, nothing that’s alive… wait that didn’t sound right), I knew there was no telling what I would rediscover when I opened that door.
Whew, it was only an old box. A half-opened old box labeled memories. Read the rest of this entry